Message Archive Submit

timelordangel:

we’ve all got that weird pretty big secret that we don’t really hide but like we don’t flaunt it like “My brother died of cancer” or “I’m gay” or “I tried to kill myself last year” or anything really and when you find out somebody’s big plot twist you know you’re in this friendship for the long run

(via satanssecretblog)

403,601 notes8.1611:12 PM • Source: timelordangel
simplypurkey:


jazzumon:

destielkills:

auntiesnixshipper:

awkwardteenagenerves:

discard-and-discover:

evolve-within:

disregardwomen:

When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.

Jesus I envy that relationship. 

this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. 

My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.

i love all of your moms

When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.


That last story is worth reblogging

simplypurkey:

jazzumon:

destielkills:

auntiesnixshipper:

awkwardteenagenerves:

discard-and-discover:

evolve-within:

disregardwomen:

When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.

Jesus I envy that relationship. 

this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. 

My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.

i love all of your moms

When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.

That last story is worth reblogging

(via guitarsandsynesthesia)

scoutregimentkarkat:

rawrimamidget:

monobeartheater:

absorr:

ultrafacts:

Source For more posts like this, CLICK HERE to follow Ultrafacts 

 Some of you are reblogging because you think its funny that programmers would talk to ducks. I’m reblogging because I think its funny picturing a programmer explaining their code, realizing what they did when they explain the bad code, then grabbing the strangling the duck while yelling “WHY WAS THE FIX THAT SIMPLE!? AM I GOING BLIND!”

AS A PROGRAMMER I CAN TELL YOU THAT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU FUCKING DO WE HAD TO BAN THE DUCKS FROM MY CLASSES BECAUSE EVERYONE WOULD FLIP THE DUCK OR THROW IT AT A WALL OR SOMETHING WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM IN THEIR CODE



psauthors do this tooexcept not w ducksi usually do it w my hoodie when its hot or with my mug w a kitten on it lmao

scoutregimentkarkat:

rawrimamidget:

monobeartheater:

absorr:

ultrafacts:

Source For more posts like this, CLICK HERE to follow Ultrafacts

 Some of you are reblogging because you think its funny that programmers would talk to ducks. I’m reblogging because I think its funny picturing a programmer explaining their code, realizing what they did when they explain the bad code, then grabbing the strangling the duck while yelling “WHY WAS THE FIX THAT SIMPLE!? AM I GOING BLIND!”

AS A PROGRAMMER I CAN TELL YOU THAT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU FUCKING DO WE HAD TO BAN THE DUCKS FROM MY CLASSES BECAUSE EVERYONE WOULD FLIP THE DUCK OR THROW IT AT A WALL OR SOMETHING WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM IN THEIR CODE

ps

authors do this too

except not w ducks

i usually do it w my hoodie when its hot or with my mug w a kitten on it lmao

(via iammadscientist)

78,872 notes8.1611:11 PM • Source: ultrafacts

macklemack:

50 shades of dark circles under my eyes

(via satanssecretblog)

1,863,350 notes8.1611:10 PM • Source: ratche-t

bootipop:

I got one of those sleeping masks you put over your eyes to keep the light out of your eyes and i was like “haha I wonder what this looks like on” so i took it to the mirror and put it on and then I realized the flaw in my plan

(via guitarsandsynesthesia)

82,218 notes8.1610:50 PM • Source: bootipop
67,557 notes8.1610:50 PM • Source: clamperl

danwasonfireonce:

danwasonfireonce:

danwasonfireonce:

I JUST FOUND OUT THAT TWO OF MY “HETEROSEXUAL” GUY BEST FRIENDS WERE FUCKING EACH OTHER AND MY BEST FRIEND CAUGHT THEM IM CHOKING 

image

this is the best day ever 

image

of course you are

(via jeffersonstarships67)

366,316 notes8.1610:50 PM • Source: danwasonfireonce

essu-rwby-desu:

RWBY - Weiss Schnee: Well at least I’m trying!

It almost sounded like Weiss was about to cry when she got shot down by Pun-master Yang.

On another note.

(via roguelikegamer)

1,736 notes8.1610:50 PM • Source: essu-rwby-desu

earthnation:

DONT GO THRU OLD CONVERSATIONS WITH SOMEONE WHO U USED TO BE CLOSE WITH

(via alexandragracewinchester)

gayindustrialcomplex:

fag3000:

gayindustrialcomplex:

Spiders eat their parents all the time and no one cares when they do it so what the fuck

did you eat your parents

How about you mind your own business

(via superpieinthetardis)

quotelounge:

Good Vibes HERE
2,839 notes8.1610:49 PM • Source: quotelounge

problemspoof:

tonessawicki:

why does everyone look so surprised when i say the reason for cutting my hair short is the hot weather, what were u expecting “i need to take my father’s place in war and the chinese army won’t accept women” ???

So what you’re saying is that you’re not going to help defend China from the Huns…?

(via benesmauglocked)

235,521 notes8.1610:49 PM • Source: barretweed

ven0moth:

who the hell came up with dodgeball???? what kind of sadistic asshole was like “i wanna see kids low key inflict pain on eachother so im gonna have them throw balls at eachother and call it a sport” bye

(via satanssecretblog)

4,283 notes8.1610:49 PM • Source: ven0moth
awkward-fallen-angel:

spooniestrong:

electricarc:

view fullsize
Been playing with this concept for a while.

I love this. So much.

this should be posted everywhere

awkward-fallen-angel:

spooniestrong:

electricarc:

view fullsize

Been playing with this concept for a while.

I love this. So much.

this should be posted everywhere

(via satanssecretblog)

37,894 notes8.1610:48 PM • Source: electricarc